Hello There Neighbor

I know too much about my unusual somewhat crazy neighbor. He has three dogs all named after former American presidents: Regan, Madison, and Nixon. Not the best choice of presidents but that's just my opinion. The reason I know all this is because my neighbor talks to himself, you would probably consider him insane but I've come to realize, after listening to him yell and complain loudly in the middle of the night, is that he's an extremely lonely man. I remember being his neighbor ever since I moved into this house, he use to have a son and a wife; his wife left him for another man and his son left after he turned eighteen.

Last night, while I was about to go to sleep, I heard him again. He was talking to his dogs as if he was speaking to an actual responsive human being. The first thing I heard was his old beat-up truck roaring onto the drive way and then the next thing you know he was yelling and cursing. I assume that his dogs made a mess again in the house since he kicked them out screaming "Get out! You pooped all over the floor! Look at the mess you made!" But after a couple of inaudible mumbles he came out again and to call the dogs back in saying "Ohh I missed you guys. Never do that again, okay?"

Although you might think this is really creepy, especially hearing it in the middle of the night, I've been hearing this for years so it's nothing new. But what is new is my understanding and compassion for him.

Moving Day

College starts in less than a week for me and although it's sad to think about, I am ready. For once in my life, I think this summer was way too long and I think it's time I start on my studies once again. I hate having nothing to do since I'm the type of person to always keep myself busy even though if it means cleaning the whole house. I'm all too ready to start the next chapter of my life and experience and learn new things. Growing up in a small town, you tend to have a really limited idea of how the world really is outside of your daily surroundings. One problem I've developed after living in one area my life is being too comfortable and accustomed to one area so when the day finally comes around for me to leave the nest, I'm scared and reluctant. But everyone has to go through this one day in order to mature and grow up so although I'm a little frightened to go somewhere unfamiliar with unfamiliar people, I know it's something I have to do regardless of my feelings.

So this week is going to be solely devoted to packing and spending time with family and friends.

tearful goodbye

Hi Denise,
Well it's here. You are leaving tomorrow August 29, 2009 and I am sitting here writing you a message. I'm not going to make this long; I'm just going to keep it simple and straight from the heart. Who knows the next time I'll be able to see you and when we do we probably will be busy with our own separate lives thousands of miles away. But I guess that's part of growing up and moving forward. I just want you to know that you made my years in high school that much better just by being apart of my life. You were the first friendly face I saw on my first day at Rowland High School and I will never forget that. We have been close friends for four years now and I'm just glad to have all those memories we've created to look back on. You are an amazing person, someone who is reliable and trustworthy and anyone should be glad to have you as a friend. Thanks for all the times we've had together and thanks for being the great friend that you are. I hope you have fun in Taiwan but most importantly I hope you'll be happy there because in the end that's all that matters. I won't make this a good bye so I'll just say see you later!

love,
Ivy

Chocolat

To add to my food addiction I just finished reading Chocolat which is also a mouth watering book. However the book is pretty much solely based on chocolate, dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white chocolate, chocolate cake, hot chocolate cocoa, chocolate figurines, chocolate everything. It's a beautiful book and it is also responsible for my recent weight gain. Since I started reading that book, I've managed to eat four to five chocolate truffles a day just based on mere cravings after reading a chapter. That's how much of addict I am.

Woke up today feeling like I swallowed something prickly, which I hope isn't one of those creepy crawlers that you hear about, making their way into your mouth while you're asleep. I pulled myself out of bed, walked around the house like a zombie for a couple of minutes and then start for the kitchen. Once again my mom is making some sort of contraption with the mountain of peeled potatoes which sad to say isn't going to be mashed potatoes or potato salad but once again one of my mom's mystery dishes. Oh boy.

Today I am going to the library again to pick out a whole new pile of books to read to make life a little bit more interesting. Any recommendations?

Julie and Julia

Today I watched a movie called Julie and Julia. It was great. The movie incorporated all that I love in life in two simple glorious hours. Based on two true stories, the film documents two people who both find meaning and happiness in life from cooking and tasting food. Julie who in the beginning hates her career and purposeless life, decides to cook her way through Julia Child's cook book, Mastering the Art of French Cooking, by cooking 524 recipes in 365 days; all the while blogging her successes and failures. Julia on the other hand struggles through her own issues from becoming a licensed chef to publishing her own cook book.

The movie is filled with mouth watering moments that literally drive me insane. Imagine sitting through a movie filled with desserts, oven-cooked turkeys, perfectly seasoned lobster, steaming stew with a hint of red wine, champagne and strawberries, boiled white fish fillet, pouched eggs, crisp oven baked bread with melted butter, mushroom lathered in Alfredo sauce, and my personal favorite from the movie, fried buttered bread with slices of tomato and yellow/green peppers that creates a crunchy softness that's a full on explosion of flavor and tanginess in your mouth. The golden brown bread soaks up the juices released from the tomato and peppers creating the perfect combination between the two.

One thing the movie mentions over and over is butter. "You can never have too much butter". Butter is what makes food taste ten times better. Food added together with different spices is already satisfying on its own but to add that extra boost of flavor from melted butter brings your tastes buds to a whole new level of yumminess. Basically as you can tell the movie is driving me insane. People who love food like I do, I give you a fair warning.

It's another typical day in my little yellow house and I am once again completely bored out of my mind. I wish that there was something I was passionate about or motivated to do. Which brings to the topic of writing a short story. Obviously I'm not going to write a novel but a short story should be a baby step towards the real thing. But its not as easy as you think. Trust me I've been sitting here for the past hour rummaging through by brain for something to write about. But I'm going to do it; it'll be like my little summer project. I'll keep you posted on how it goes.

Into the Wild

Ever feel really awkward in your own skin? Well I've been feeling like that a lot lately and it isn't because I'm gaining weight (thank god!) but it's just because I have an unusually low self esteem, which I guess is normal for some people. For example today I was working with this really cute guy who like a god, is super suave and charming in everything he does. And I, like the ugly duckling, was overly conscious about everything I did. Is my hair to poofy? Is there something on my face? It's really exhausting actually.

On a more positive note, I recently watched this movie or documentary you can say, called Into the Wild, which is about this guy named Chris who seeks to create a new life for himself in the wild. What initially was a brilliant plan turned out to be a huge mistake when Chris realizes the only true happiness comes from being around others, specifically loved ones. After two years in the wild without any source of human contact, Chris dies alone in the wild from eating poisonous root. Unable to express his remorse, Chris dies on his bed; his face wet from tears. The ending is especially traumatizing and heart-wrenching. I would recommend this movie to everyone of all ages although there is some nudity but it's only for expressive and artistic purposes.

Help Please

I think something is wrong with my blogger account. I can no longer search up any other users, for example when you click on one of your interests, the website will automatically find other users with the same interest as you, well that doesn't work anymore. Whenever I click on a link under my interests section, it doesn't show any other users. Does anyone know what's going on with my account?

On Love

"We fall in love hoping that we will not find in the other what we know is in ourselves - all the cowardice, weakness, laziness, dishonesty, compromise, and brute stupidity. We throw a cordon of love around the chosen one and decide that everything that lies within it will somehow be free of out faults and hence lovable. We locate inside another a perfection that eludes us within ourselves and through union with the beloved hope somehow to maintain [against evidence of all self-knowledge] a precarious faith in the species." - Alain de Button

It's hot and I'm too pissed too exhausted too sweaty to write anything else.

F the weather F the heat and F my life

I'm back again to complain about the weather. I absolutely hate it. Today was exactly 95 degrees so you can just imagine me sitting in a one bedroom apartment for 5 hours with nothing to do but read and sleep. Okay I'm lying. But doesn't it sound more dramatic that way? The truth is that I live in a five bedroom house with air conditioning but still the weather was brutally hot regardless of the circumstances I was in.

I took a 4 hour nap today which made me feel completely exhausted afterward for some particular reason. I woke up feeling one hundred years old and unreasonably indignant. I rummaged through the fridge after my nap and ate 4 chocolate truffles which I immediately regretted eating afterward. So chocolate stained, hot, and pissed off, I threw a bitch fit and who took the blame? My little starry-eyed brother who just so happened to be the closest thing around me at the moment. There you go, me and dry hot weather just don't mix.

My head hurts now, great.

From the East toe the West and back again

Nothing much has happened since my last post but I'll update you anyways.

I've been reading On the Road and I'm almost done and I hate to say this but it's not really that great. I had the hardest time trying to concentrate on some of the chapters without, sad to say, slowly dozing off. I guess I just don't understand what's the main point of the story and I hate not being able to grasp the whole purpose of a book. The novel is suppose to be one of Jack Kerouac's more notable works but the whole book itself is about two mad men named Sal and Dean traveling across American from the East to the West and then back again. They travel without any thought or reason; just merely based on their impulse to go somewhere and start over new. So basically they travel mile after mile with one destination in mind: to get to New York without any knowledge as to how they're going to get there, just that they are.

On the surface Sal and Dean just look like a bunch of idiotic low-lives with no purpose in life but as you squint to see what lies beneath the surface, you realize that they are what signifies the "beat" generation. Which with the help of Wikipedia is the "rejection of mainstream American values, experimentation with drugs and alternate forms of sexuality, and an interest in Eastern spirituality." And although that may make the book seem like a pretty significant contributor to the development of American cultural history, I still stick to my initial thought that the book doesn't live up to all the hype.

On another note, I've gained 10 pounds and am about to jump off a cliff. Must exercise but as you all know that's physically impossible when you live in America, especially L.A., where there's a restaurant and fast food place outside of every gym. So I rest my case.

4th of July

It's a hundred and something degrees and I'm about to go crazy. It's a lazy Sunday and I can't even sit here without sweating. It's disgusting.

So let me tell you about 4th of July. It turned out to be a bit disappointing but overall it was better than staying at home watching my mom cry her eyes out watching overly dramatic soap operas about unrealistic characters being put in unrealistic situations.

Here's what I realized during 4th of July; all my once charming and innocent little chums have turned into psycho drug addicted maniacs whose sudden motto in life is to "Life fast, die young." For the guys it's been one drug or another and for the girls it's just been SEX. It's really disturbing to find out that your once high school lunch buddy is sleeping around with multiple guys just for fun and who you happened to see yesterday making out with someone who was obviously high. So I took a couple of jello shots and grabbed some of whatever was left of the food and exited with a couple of friends who were also terrified at the what was happening inside that one storied house jam-packed with drunk hormonal teenagers.

I ended up watching fireworks from a little cafe near home which turned out to be perfect since I'm a late night coffee addict who just so happens to have midnight cravings. So after my fourth cup of coffee I decided that it was time end my little escapade and go home.

Which reminds me I have a free coupon to IHOP yipppee! which means infinite refills! My ultimate scheme is to drain all the coffee out of that place.

Oh Hello Again!

So once again I've neglected my once daily entries. This is exactly what happens when you get lazy. So here's an update of what's been going on in my life.

Summer officially started. How do I know? Well here's the deal. One day the sun just decided to show just how scorching hot it really is by shining it's vicious rays down on L.A., frying everyone, especially me, into a nice crisp golden brown color like if I was some bread in the oven waiting to rise. And yes once it gets hot, I take naps. I guess that comes with the package of not having much to do over summer so for every moment that I'm not preoccupied, I am dozing off on my favorite comfy couch, which just so happens to be screaming "sleep on me! You know you want to" and taunting me with is oh-so-comfortable and inviting goodness. Trust me it's very persuasive.

Besides that Independence Day is coming up and I unfortunately have work. Bummer. But luckily Baskin Robbins is closing early that day which leaves me four hours to have fun and get drunk. Yepp

College starts in a couple of months, to be precise three months, and I'm not really looking forward to moving in and all that pish posh. I just want to suspend time and just have it be summer vacation all year long. I want to be able to relax, travel, and just do everything that I have in mind to do before school starts again. And hopefully I'll update you along the way. I hate having to be absent for long periods of time like I did do since my last entry was almost a month ago.

At the moment I'm reading this one book called On the Road by Jack Kerouac which I heard was suppose to be pretty good. So I guess that will keep me busy for a while.

That's it for now. Toodles!

Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs

So it's been a while since my last entry and I am terribly sorry for the delay but summer just started and the events just keep piling up. I guess you can say for once in my life I am living like a normal human being.

After work yesterday I had the opportunity to go watch UP which was good, but not great. I guess when you have high expectations for something, you more or less always end up getting disappointed. The movie was overall very cute and very funny BUT after hearing about how "great" it was for weeks, I expected more from a Disney/Pixar film.

Now for the short film, Partly Cloudy, that premiered before the movie actually started, that was great. I was cracking up the whole time like a deprived child watching her first animated film. The animation was superb and the film overall was hilarious which was pretty amazing since like other Pixar short films, there were no words involved. Therefore in order to understand what's actually going on all you have to do is just watch.

On another note, summer started just recently and since then the scale has once again hated me due to the amount of weight I've managed to gain over the course of a couple of days. I think it was all due to the events that took place before graduation for example, Grad Nite, graduation dinner, and banquets, that screwed up my metabolism and eating patterns. Which reminds me, Disneyland will never look the same to me after Grad Nite. Seeing thousands of high school seniors gathering together in one place, dancing, getting high, dropping ecstasy tablets, and grinding up on each other, is wayy tooo disgusting and disturbing for me. All the sweat and saliva and who knows what else, that was exchanged that night is just way too dramatizing for me to ever see Disneyland as the once innocent theme park known as the "happiest place on earth." Yuck!

Just keeping you posted. Tootles!

Sizzle Sizzle Spice Spice

This is what high school has resorted to during our last few days of school. We watch a movie, we write an essay about it, watch another movie do a power point presentation about it, or better yet some teachers just allow us to sit there and do nothing all period long.

I know it would be strange of me to complain about doing nothing at school but yet again I'm going to complain. I abhor wasting time away by doing absolutely nothing in class. For the past few days it has gotten to the point where I've slept through a whole day on school, sleeping from one period to the next all because I'm bored out of my mind.

Today, not surprisingly, we watched Star Wars The Attack of the Clones which is a pretty decent movie despite the fact that Hayden Christensen can not act but overall I give it a thumbs up. During the movie, even without my glasses, I was once again reminded of how magnificently crafted Hayden features are. I was practically blind while watching the movie and I had to squint and pull at the sides of my eyes during the love scenes just to get an outline of how gorgeous and how mesmerizing he can be with his breathtakingly squinty stare. DROOL

You get the idea.

Since I haven't really been sleeping lately, I've developed this bad habit called bitchiness which is fairly unpleasant when you happen to be around me during one of my numerous melt downs. Therefore I've decided, more sleep, more exercise, and less binge eating. I'll keep you updated on how it all goes. But for now I must say my goodnights before I turn into some grizzly unrecognizable beast.

Something's wrong. I think something's wrong with me.

Today was a very bad day, one of those day where you feel extremely down. It scares me to tell you the truth, to feel this sad over literally nothing. At lunch all my friends were laughing and chatting and just having a good time but I just felt out of place. I was sitting in my six period class and it surprised me just how depressed I was, I couldn't control it, the deep dark hole of loneliness and hopelessness was swallowing me whole. I told the teacher that I needed to use the restroom and I called my sister, and that's when the tears started flowing. She asked "what's wrong?" and i replied "I don't know" and kept crying. I think that scariest thing is feeling a certain way and not knowing why.

Five Pounds in Just Two Weeks

So lately I've been this monstrosity that literally eats anything it can get it's hand on. Since prom is officially over I've been to every restaurant in a three mile radius from my house. Just these past two weeks, I've managed to eat out at: Subway, Baja Fresh, Oho Hawaiian BBQ, Ajison's Ramen, Souplantation, Yogurtland, Coconut Bay, In & Out, Ten Ren, Taco Bell, Dolphin Bay, and Niko Niko Sushi. So in the span of 14 days, I've eaten Mexican, Thai, American, Chinese, Hawaiian, and Japanese food. The sad part of having a job is that you end up spending lots and lots of money on useless things such as food. Yes, while you're eating you may feel happy but in the end you really don't gain anything out of it besides a bloated stomach and a couple of extra pounds on the scale.

Besides my sinful indulgences, lately I've been assigned this one project from my English teacher. It's a rememory project where you have to look back on your four years of high school and write about them. The minimum is five essays and I haven't even started one and, it gets worse, it's due in practically 2 days. Plus there a visual portion as well where you have to decorate the project and make it appealing to the eye. This means I have to bust out my good old creativity skills which I don't have.

Well wish me luck. I have to go tackle my journal and dig for things to write about.

How Unpleasant

So it just so happens that it's summer again. I swear two days ago the weather was still chilly and breezy but yesterday all hell broke loose and the sun came storming out, beaming on all of us chanting "I'm back!"

To make things more uncomfortable, I'm sweating which is all too unpleasant when you have to sit still and type. It the worst feeling in the world to have the dry molten sun blasting it's fiery blazes of light down on you while you slowly feel your skin crackle and peel. As you can tell I absolutely hate hot weather, I rather be frozen to death in frosting temperatures than endure what I did today. I can probably fry and egg on the god damn pavement right now. Okay maybe I'm overreacting just a tad but seriously I loathe southern California in the summer time.